Question: How should I get my boyfriend to plan stuff (we are long distance so I am talking about online stuff) without just straight up asking/begging for it? 

Answer: You can playfully suggest it and see if he catches on to your need for more planned activities. You can be passive aggressive about it too. However, I would not recommend either option because not only will they frustrate you, he may not catch on to what you want and it is not the healthiest way to go about the situation. I would strongly suggest straight up asking him to plan more stuff, so that he knows your feelings and what you want without mind games. It is also the easiest way to get the change you want instead of having to wait for him to hopefully get the hint and do it himself. Long distance relationships are hard enough, do not make it more complicated by dancing around the things that you want. 

Question: How do you let a guy down gently? He was flirting and I thought he wanted to be friends and I have a boyfriend. 

Answer: There are a bunch of different ways that you can casually let him know you do not want him without even having to let him down. Especially since he was just flirting and maybe has not developed a full-on crush yet. The top two ways would be: (1) casually mentioning you have a boyfriend in a conversation and (2) if you have each other on social media, posting a picture with your boyfriend. The first option would be better than the second because you are directly telling the guy that you have a boyfriend while the second can be 50/50 depending on the type of picture used. There is a third option which would be just saying you have a boyfriend and that you do not feel comfortable with the admirer flirting with you. It is more blunt, but it gets the message across. 

Question: I told my friend that I cannot live with them because they drain my social battery, but I can still hang out with them. They got really mad at me and I do not know if I was being mean by telling them or not. Was I? 

Answer: It is not a mean thing to say, it is just your truth in this situation. No one likes to hear that they are draining someone’s social battery, but if that is the case then it is a valid reason to not want to live with that person. Imagine having a horrible day and only wanting your bed, but when you get back to your room, there is someone constantly talking to you about nothing important and you have to listen because you do not want to be seen as mean? That sounds awful. They may not see it the way that you do, so maybe you can explain a bit more to them if you did not already tell them about your reasoning for not wanting to live together and give them an example of why. I would recommend sprinkling in some things you like about them so they do not feel awful about themselves or like they are a bad person, which may have been the original part they got mad about. 

Disclaimer: The advice given in this column does not reflect the opinions of the entire Oswegonian staff.