Some experts suggest that children are greatly affected by the divorce of their parents, but others claim that there are minimal effects.

Evelyn Benavides, Oswego State sociology professor, said older children are more affected by their parents’ divorce than younger children because of a shift in family structure. However, Reid Adler, Oswego State graduate student, said otherwise.

“I was 19 years old when my parents got a divorce. It was one of those incidents that was a long time coming,” Adler said. “It was sudden, but I kind of hoped they would divorce… I was OK with it.”

Adler said socially and academically, his life remained the same. However, his 13-year-old brother’s life was altered and is still affected today.

“Sibling support systems are important,” Adler said. “People with siblings tend to handle divorce better than only children. I spoke to my younger brother a lot when my parents were getting a divorce. He kind of separates himself from the whole family.”

Adler and his brother’s experiences contrast with Benavides’ statement. However, Randy Rivera, an Oswego State junior, provides a similar example.

“I was 8 when my father left,” Rivera said. “Their divorce didn’t really affect me. I had a good relationship with my dad, but I just remember him being there, and then the next day, he wasn’t.”

Rivera said his social and academic life did not change after the divorce. His father being gone became the norm for him.

“I think young kids are adaptable, and they adapt to the family structure easier,” Benavides said. “When you get set into patterns of behavior, it is a lot harder to adjust.”

A divorce can greatly affect a families’ economic situation. However, Adler’s parents’ divorce is an apparant exception. Although money was the cause of their divorce, he said their economic status remained the same.

“My parents fell on financial troubles,” Adler said. “My mom tried to remedy them without telling my dad, and my dad got p***ed when he found out. But their separation didn’t really have an impact on our financial issues. That remained the same after the divorce.”

However, Rivera’s economic situation after his parents’ divorce was slightly different.

“We didn’t have that luxury to spend anymore that we sort of had before,” Rivera said. “I started asking for less toys and stopped being a spoiled kid who wants everything. I tried to help my mom out. The divorce still impacts me economically.”

Benavides said when children go from a two-parent home to a single-parent home, there is going to be an economic impact.

“There is a 10 to 30 percent economic decline,” Benavides said. “Studies done after the 1980s showed that it mainly depends on class. In poor families, the impact isn’t that extreme because of low wages and things like that…But poverty does increase for children with divorced parents.”

Social impacts can also be found in divorced children. Adler was not affected socially, but Rivera was greatly impacted.

“My mom was overly protective,” Rivera said. “She never wanted me to go to the park with my friends after school because she’d worry about my safety, and because of that, I lost friendships. I think if my dad was around, she would have been less protective.”

Benavides said it is also found that many children lose a connection with their fathers, especially in families of color. Although the statistics for this are decreasing, it remains to be one of the largest effects of a divorce.

Couples do not always stay together for their children, but according to Benavides, studies have found that the divorce rate has been relatively stable for the past 30 years. Recently, divorce rates have been decreasing, but the impact it has on children remains the same.

Photo: Rachel Futterman | The Oswegonian