The Oswegonian

The Independent Student Newspaper of Oswego State

DATE

Nov. 2, 2024

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Archives In the Office Opinion

Oswego State officially tired of geese’s crap

With the dreaded winter months quickly approaching, one familiar campus bird will finally be departing. Geese may be an icon of sorts on the Oswego State campus, but here at The Oswegonian, we have come to a consensus that we are sick of their s***. Literally.

When walking to and from class, we often come face-to-face with a goose or even a whole flock. Nothing is more stressful than being angrily hissed at and wondering if you are going to have to start running. We are tired of having to constantly watch where we are stepping and be in fear of getting attacked on a daily basis. We all have seen the viral videos of children being viciously run down by geese, and we would rather not be one of the next victims. Many students even have to sit in their car and lay on the horn while waiting for what feels like 50 fearless geese to slowly cross the road, making us late for class.

To many students that may not be from this area, they might see the geese as beautiful, feathered creatures. What they have not experienced is a goose puffed-up, leaned back, wings flapping and about to charge. If they are not strutting around campus like they own the place, you will often see them overhead probably deciding who they want to defecate on next. The squawking they let out is nothing less than frightening. Yes, this may be a little dramatic, but when geese are the only animal a student on the campus comes in contact with for the majority of the year, this discussion is relevant.

An area where the geese cause a significant disturbance is when they leave their droppings across the athletic turf or grass fields. This results in grotesque green stains on uniforms that definitely are not from the grass. Some schools have found a solution to this by placing coyote decoys on the fields to trick the geese into keeping away. Maybe the campus should look into investing in decoys or something of the sort for the comfort of the student body. Maybe then our school would not be associated with geese so much as to have them featured in our own Snapchat geotag.

The geese have run this campus for long enough this semester, and we say good riddance. Until next year, geese. You will not be missed.